Thursday, December 23, 2010

I'm Back, Back In The New York Groove...

As usual, my most brilliant thought of the day began as an idea for a potential facebook status. A lot of times that's the way it happens. I'll think of something, then decide to make it my facebook status, then, as I expand whatever would-be status I've chosen, it gets longer and longer until I think, "Whatever, I'll just make it into a blog". And so, here we are again, friends.

So now I bet you're wondering what my brilliant thought was. You're thinking, "Well, she's pretty random with these posts, and there doesn't seem to be any rhyme or reason whatsoever. Which means she's probably going to make this post about howler monkeys."

While I do have a lot to say about howler monkeys and someday I do plan to make my opinions publicly known, that's not what this blog is about. Nope. This is a very special blog, about some very special little things. Things that often gets overlooked in the glitz and glamor of this day and age. Things that effects many different aspects of our lives, and we don't even realize it! These things are magical. These things are Awesome (the A was capitalized on purpose). What are these things?

Pistachios.

That's right, you heard me, pistachios. I'm sitting here in my basement (where I've been banished to due to my grandparents' arrival), and for some reason we've got the biggest bag of pistachios in the history of mankind sitting next to the couch. It's like, ten pounds, no lie. So while I sit here being mildly entertained watching my brothers play football on the wii, I am also ingesting a semi-large quantity of these magical little green nuts.

First of all, if you live somewhere where pistachios are outlawed by penalty of death by decapitation, you might not even know what they look like. Allow me to educate you. Pistachios are yummy green nuts, encased in an impressively impenetrable shell. At first glance, you can only see the shell, except for a narrow slit, through which you can see the brilliant shine of the tasty green morsel inside. To get to it, you have to pry the sides apart and break the shell in half.

I remember eating my first pistachio. It was at my grandparents' house. My older sister (hi Nikki!) was eating them, and telling me how wonderful they were. I was like, "Um, no way am I eating anything green." Nikki explained that even though it was green, it tasted really good. Good thing I have respect for my sister's taste buds. Against my better judgement, I pried the shell apart and hesitantly placed the strange food on my tongue. I chewed. I swallowed. I was hooked forever.

So pistachios taste good. But are they blog worthy? What makes them more special than all the other stuff that tastes good? I am SO glad you asked! :)

1) Pistachios are better for you than any other nut!
2) They taste better than any other nut! (that's just MY opinion, but you're reading MY blog, so get used to it).
3) Without pistachios, humans might never have realized what fingers were for. (that part was what my facebook status was going to be).
4) Because of the fact that you have to pry the shell apart, the nut will taste better because you've had to work to get to it! It breeds a healthy sense of accomplishment and makes you feel like King Kong!
5) It makes you realize how hard work and perseverance pay off in the end, which will benefit you in all areas of life!
6) Breaking the shell in half allows us to expel an bit of our destructive energy with every single pistachio, getting it safely out of our system and freeing us to spend more of our time being creative and constructive.

So as you can now see and understand, pistachios are wonderful. They are Awesome. They are magical. They are the cornerstone of human civilization. If more people ate pistachios, we would see a decrease in crime, gangsters, and sadness, and an increase in artists, poets, engineers, and pistachio flavored things.

That being said, who's excited for Christmas?!?! ME! ME! I'M EXCITED!

That also being said, tonight's season finale of Psych was good, but not as epic as I expected. I think I psych myself up too much (bwahaha, get it?!).

That also, ALSO being said, I'm tired. It's 3:00 in the morning, and I'm starting to make typos. I want to go to sleep, but unfortunately my brothers are still playing the wii and it's kind of difficult to get to sleep with John Madden yelling in my face.

"IT'S A BLITZ! HE'S UNDER PRESSURE...HE THROWS INTO TRIPLE COVERAGE...AND CONNECTS! HE'S AT THE FORTY...THE THIRTY...THE TWENTY...AND BROUGHT DOWN AT THE FOURTEEN! THEY'RE GOING NO HUDDLE...THAY'RE GOING NO HUDDLE!!"

I dare you to try to sleep under those conditions. Those announcers need some serious Xanax. At least I've got a lifetime supply of pistachios to keep me company.