Saturday, January 26, 2008

The Most Incredible Phenomenon In The Entire World

So I'm now getting back to my "normal" style of writing because of something funny that happened the other day at work. so, first off, I must explain. there are these huge balloons in Hy Vee where I work, for Valentine's Day. they're seriously huge; like the size of a...a...really really big balloon. anyway, they have these little signs on them saying "poke me". when I first saw that I was like, "pfft. poke the balloon? what a joke." but then I started to wonder what would happen if I poked the balloon. would it explode and rain candy like a pinata? would a Genie appear? Would we have world peace?

But I've never done well with curiosity. I held off for as long as I could, but finally I had had enough. I had to know. and I had to know now. so I pull the string down and poke the balloon.

What ensued was the most fantastic, amazing, stimulating, incredible thing that's ever happened to me in my life: the balloon started to sing. my jaw dropped and my heart seemed to stop and my brain turned to soup. my eyes glazed over as the balloon continued to sing "You're Still The One".

You are still the one that makes me shout
Still the one that I dream about
We're still having fun, and you're still the one

When it stopped singing, I was still overcome with awe. I think just the fact that it sings when you poke it was the most incredible thing to me. my coworkers were a little less awed than I was. apparently, they all knew about the singing balloons and didn't find them especially exciting. in fact, most just found them downright annoying.

Are you kidding me??? they SING, people!! they SING when you POKE them!! I was excited. not even the fact that none of the other Hy Vee employees were excited about the singing balloons could dampen my fun.

But apparently, I've poked them too many times lately, because my coworkers always give me these nasty glances every time I stray too close to any of the singing balloons. so the other day, I made up my mind that I would get back into the good graces of my coworkers and not poke the balloons even once. it was going to be tough, but I was determined to stick it out. (at least for one day. :D)

So most of the day goes by fairly fast and uneventfully, until there's a lull in my line and my gaze falls on the balloon. I could feel my eyes getting wide and my mouth starting to drool. it was hypnotizing, that balloon was. and suddenly, I couldn't help myself. I walked over to the balloon, pulled the string down, and poised my finger over the shiny colorful surface.

All of a sudden, time stopped. really, I swear it did. about five of my coworkers were looking my way when it happened, and each had a hilarious (and dangerous) expression on their face. the girl manning the Express Lane looked mortified, her eyes were as big as dinner plates, and I knew the very last thing in the world that she wanted to hear was "You're still the one" coming from the balloon. the girl to my right had much the same expression on her face, but I also clearly read in her eyes some pretty severe ultimatums. My manager walking by screeched to a halt and gave a little shake of his head, begging me, pleading with me, probably on his hands and knees if he'd had time or if he'd thought it would've done any good NOT to poke the balloon. they were all at my mercy, and they knew it.

But none of them understood. the balloons could SING! it was my civic duty to poke the balloon. I owed it to the masses. it would be a sin not to. on top of all that, there was still the simple fact that the balloon would sing if I poked it. how could I not? I poked the balloon. bopping my head back to my register, I knew I would have to endure unspeakable hardship from my coworkers for the rest of the day. I smiled and hummed along. It was soo worth it.

You are still the one that makes me shout
Still the one that I dream about
We're still having fun, and you're still the one!

Peace out.

Sunday, January 20, 2008

Late Night Woes

So, I'd better warn you now that this whole blog is going to be kind of rough and sketchy...these thoughts aren't completely formed yet, but I think they're formed enough to write them. oh, and sorry to anybody who came here this time to read that funny nonsense that I write so often because it's all I know how to write. sorry, all of you. this time I'm in a pensive, thoughtful mood which I am in quite often, but never write about, and it's due partly to the late hour and partly to a long internal struggle which has yet to be appeased in my mind. wow. this is already rough and sketchy. told you so.

So for a long time (I'm not sure exactly how long but for at least the past four months or so) I've been completely and totally lost as far as a future career is concerned. I don't know if any of you have ever played Four-Square before, but that's kinda how my life has been lately; bouncing from one square to another, one minute I want to be something with all my heart, the next minute I'm considering something else. it's incredibly have no idea.

I've been praying and reading my Bible like mad for a long time, but I just never hear anything back. one of the most frustrating things, I think, is that I say to God, "I'll do anything you want. anything at all. anything. just please tell me what to do." but He doesn't. I know I'm not supposed to, and I try not to, but sometimes I just can't help but wonder why He doesn't answer me. if I'm willing to do anything or go anywhere, I just want to know what to do, I don't get why He wouldn't tell me. and it's not just that I'm not getting an answer, it's also that I'm not getting any kind of response. that's the hardest thing of all. I pray and read and pray and read but I just always feel like a blind person wandering around all by myself.

I've been thinking a lot about this lately. now, say we have two choices. we can do A or B. if God wants us to do one but not the other, does that mean if we pick the wrong one we'll mess up God's divine plan?? OR does God already know ahead of time what we're going to do and simply plans accordingly? I'm inclined to believe the latter. but if that is true, then why should I even bother worrying about it? by that logic, I should just pick one and it'll be the right one because nobody can mess up God's plan. I'm sure that theory is full of holes, but for the life of me I can't find them.

Anyway...that's where my thoughts are these days. sorry this was such a strange post. it's kind of depressing, now that I think about it. ah, well, I blame it on the hour of night and my brain, which doesn't turn off at night like everybody else's. anyway, if you made it all the way through these ramblings...thanks. and if anybody out there has answers to these questions I wouldn't mind hearing them...

Wednesday, January 16, 2008


*We haven't had a poem for a while, and I know some of you have heard this one already...but I really like it. I wrote this one evening as I saw the sun setting and it was so beautiful and I thought: "Does this happen every night...and I don't even notice it??"*

Running through the busy day
Wrapped in a blanket of stress
Running here and doing that
Complaining that life is a mess

The sun comes up with an encore of color
Lighting up the sky
The flowers open and reach for the sun
For the sake of delight, the birds fly

From one problem to another
Life is getting old
You’re so busy fixing problems
You’re missing the beauty unfold

The blue sky graced by white puffy clouds
The small spider spinning its home
A busy little bee fills its legs with pollen
And heads back to the honeycomb

Unanimously shedding their leaves each year
The trees lapse into sleep
The clouds roll in, the thunder rolls
And the sky begins to weep

When evening replaces the daylight
The sky fades into twilight gray
Some animals are going to sleep
Some are coming out to play

Now it’s nighttime, the day is gone
And there’s something you should know
It’s been a whole day of incessant beauty
And you’ve missed the entire show.