Monday, September 15, 2008

Please Move.

Bikers. not those old men who look like Santa Clause who are covered with tattoos and piercings and drive around on Harleys. No. I'm talking about those people in skin tight body suits and pointy helmets and insist that they're not bothering anyone, oblivious to the three blocks of seething traffic behind them. those are the bikers I mean.

Bikers drive me nuts. unless they're actually not in the way (which is rarely the case), they always seem content to hold up traffic to their heart's content. the other day, this biker was riding right in front of me on a one lane road. he was kinda off to the side, like he just expected me to go around him. "Yeah, dude. I'm really going to swerve into oncoming traffic to go around you. good thinking."

In my opinion, they invented bike paths for bikes and streets for cars. you don't see me driving around in my Buick on bike paths, whistling away, oblivious to all the seething bikers giving me dirty looks. what makes them think they can? some of us have places to be, and would like to go faster than 5 mph.

I know, I shouldn't get so uptight about it. but I can't help it! yes, I'm bitter. yes, I'm prejudiced. yes, sometimes I want to drive over them. to me, it's like a skinny little guy who blackmails a sumo wrestler. the sumo wrestler is even more mad about it, because he knows he could break the skinny guy like a twig (but he doesn't, see, cause he's getting blackmailed). oh blast. that made no sense. even to me. sorry, all. sounds like something off Matlock, though, doesn't it. Y'know, I always thought Matlock should marry Jessica Fletcher. then they could start like...a whole new series and Matlock could stop griping about being single! ALL IN FAVOR!!

Holy Cow! we've strayed from my original topic! let's bring it back, people. Bikers. What to do? we can't drive over them, much as we'd like to at times. No, my parents always taught me that driving over people is wrong. We can't make them stay off the roads. unfortunately they have as much right to be there as we do. So...I guess the only thing we can really do is just do what we've always done. suck it up and drive 5 mph until said biker decides he's good and ready to get out of your way.

So...I guess this blog was pretty pointless. :/

"Amarillo By Morning" --George Strait. though I am a fierce country music hater, I pretty much grew up with this song, and therefore decided I was within my rights to buy it. besides, it's got pretty words and it caters to my inner wanderer. :)

4 comments:

jnet said...

i'd say you have a little road rage :)

Johanna said...

Naw. this was mostly just a joke...as is most everything I write. I think I tend to blow things out of proportion. on purpose. :)

Hero's Cousin said...

DANG IT! you stole my next blog!!! seriously! i've been meaning to write about how much i hate bikers for a long time now. i think they should go the speed limit or GET OUT OF THE WAY.

Johanna said...

Oh good! I was afraid you would hate it or even worse...DISAGREE!! :O