Monday, March 3, 2008
Random
So I went to work tonight, and lately I've been picking up these little isms that customers generally display. por ejemplo, whenever I want to ask if they found everything, it usually happens like this:
"Did you find--"
"Yes."
And then I keep going, "...everything you were looking for?" and then there's an awkward silence, cause they've already answered, and usually, just to fill the empty space, they end up answering the question again. for a long LONG time I've wanted to do it like this:
"Did you find--"
"Yes."
"--a leprechaun?"
Just to see the look on their face. priceless. maybe I will someday. I bet if I did they'd wait for me to finish the question next time. then again, there probably wouldn't be a next time, cause I'd probably get fired. it would be so worth it.
So, I love winter. I love winter like I love my computer. but, just as with my computer, I am beginning to love it less and less. winter has been here a long long time, and I really really really just want to roll down my window while driving 60 mph and stick my head out the window like a dog and just let the wind whip through my hair. I'm so excited for that! it's the very first thing on the "what to do when Spring gets here" list. it also happens to be 2nd, 3rd, 4th and 5th. 6th, 7th, 8th, and all the way to 100th is to lounge in my newly acquired hammock. :D
I'm also excited for my birthday, which is coming up. curiously, as I've grown older, my enjoyment of Christmas has faded (I think it's because it's not as magical as it was way back in the day when I was a gullible child) but my enjoyment of my birthday is the same as it was when I was a small child. I do love my birthday! :D and this year, I'll be turning 19. it's a bittersweet birthday. this is the last birthday I will have to be a teenager. on my next birthday, I'll be turning 20 years old!! I'll be...I'll be an...an...OLD PERSON!! so I'm determined to enjoy this one with everything I've got in my still-for-a-little-while-young bones. after this birthday, I'll also be able to swipe alcohol at the store. it seems a strange thing to long for, but you have no idea how annoying it is to have to call a manager up every single time somebody wants to purchase alcohol. also, apparently I LOOK old enough, so everybody brings all their alcohol into my lane. curses.
My car is in the shop this week, getting fixed I hope. I hope to get it back on Wednesday, fully repaired and looking good as new. I've even driven by the place where it is to see if I could catch a glimpse of my car, and never did see him. I'd better have him back by the time the weather gets good, though, cause I don't think sticking my head out the window of anybody else's car while I drive would be as magical.
Anyway, this was just sort of an update on my life...or whatever you wanna call it...there was absolutely zero thinking beforehand on this. I'm sorry, all of you. this post wasn't really anything. you may now return to your lives.
Monday, February 11, 2008
Beauty Can't Be Ordinary
A large fluffy cloud sat lightly on the horizon, the sky behind it was bright pink and large, brilliant sunbeams cascaded out of the cloud, going every different direction. it was positively dazzling. I had to force my eyes to return to the road where they belonged, but it was hard to do. I stared at the cars in front of me, all the heads I could see where facing dutifully toward the road, oblivious to the amazing show happening right outside their window.
I couldn't take it. it actually almost made me mad. I started pointing at the sunset and shouting, "Do you SEE it, people?? DO YOU SEE IT??!" they couldn't hear me, of course. not that I had expected them to. I was just so upset. they were driving it gray cars, on a gray road, through a gray city, living gray little lives. you'd think they'd maybe notice the glorious sunset! maybe they'd wait for it every night, anticipating a splash of color in their gray existence. not that I had a lot of room to talk. though I do go out of my way to appreciate beauty, if I hadn't happened to look out my window, I wouldn't have seen the spectacular sight that God was making right in front of me.
It really bothers me when people don't appreciate beauty. it doesn't really bug me if they don't notice it right away. I mean really...who notices ALL the beauty ALL the time? but if they see it, but don't care about it...that gets on every nerve in my body. like the other night, I was driving a friend home after a fun evening, and I notice the moon. it's just an itty-bitty sliver of a thing, but you can see the whole outline clearly, and the light reflected off the moon shone on the clouds around it, like a little halo. it was absolutely gorgeous. I quickly pointed it out to my friend, who gave it a quick glance and then continued to babble about something or other. I was ticked. on the inside. I hardly ever get visibly upset. I keep everything bottled up inside. I'll probably explode someday. :)
Maybe I shouldn't get that way. but I just can't help it! I'm continually captivated by beauty...and I guess I just want everybody else to be, too. but if sunsets only happened once every ten years, you bet we'd be captivated. if it only snowed once every ten years, you bet even old crusty politicians would be running outside to catch snowflakes on their tongues. if the moon only showed itself every ten years, you bet we'd stay up all night admiring it. on and on it goes. beauty is ordinary. we see it so often, we don't even know it's there. HOW HORRIBLE! that's just so wrong. we don't care about beauty because we have too much of it. "Excuse me, God? could you turn down the beauty a little bit? we're kind of getting swamped down here. great, thanks. You're awesome." but he still creates. he still creates a masterpiece every single night, even though the ones he's creating it for find it ordinary and routine. that's love right there, folks.
Anyways...that's all. I just wanted to shake everybody a little bit and remind them to take a moment today to admire God's beauty and thank him for it. after all...it's there for our enjoyment. :)
Saturday, January 26, 2008
The Most Incredible Phenomenon In The Entire World
But I've never done well with curiosity. I held off for as long as I could, but finally I had had enough. I had to know. and I had to know now. so I pull the string down and poke the balloon.
What ensued was the most fantastic, amazing, stimulating, incredible thing that's ever happened to me in my life: the balloon started to sing. my jaw dropped and my heart seemed to stop and my brain turned to soup. my eyes glazed over as the balloon continued to sing "You're Still The One".
You are still the one that makes me shout
Still the one that I dream about
We're still having fun, and you're still the one
When it stopped singing, I was still overcome with awe. I think just the fact that it sings when you poke it was the most incredible thing to me. my coworkers were a little less awed than I was. apparently, they all knew about the singing balloons and didn't find them especially exciting. in fact, most just found them downright annoying.
Are you kidding me??? they SING, people!! they SING when you POKE them!! I was excited. not even the fact that none of the other Hy Vee employees were excited about the singing balloons could dampen my fun.
But apparently, I've poked them too many times lately, because my coworkers always give me these nasty glances every time I stray too close to any of the singing balloons. so the other day, I made up my mind that I would get back into the good graces of my coworkers and not poke the balloons even once. it was going to be tough, but I was determined to stick it out. (at least for one day. :D)
So most of the day goes by fairly fast and uneventfully, until there's a lull in my line and my gaze falls on the balloon. I could feel my eyes getting wide and my mouth starting to drool. it was hypnotizing, that balloon was. and suddenly, I couldn't help myself. I walked over to the balloon, pulled the string down, and poised my finger over the shiny colorful surface.
All of a sudden, time stopped. really, I swear it did. about five of my coworkers were looking my way when it happened, and each had a hilarious (and dangerous) expression on their face. the girl manning the Express Lane looked mortified, her eyes were as big as dinner plates, and I knew the very last thing in the world that she wanted to hear was "You're still the one" coming from the balloon. the girl to my right had much the same expression on her face, but I also clearly read in her eyes some pretty severe ultimatums. My manager walking by screeched to a halt and gave a little shake of his head, begging me, pleading with me, probably on his hands and knees if he'd had time or if he'd thought it would've done any good NOT to poke the balloon. they were all at my mercy, and they knew it.
But none of them understood. the balloons could SING! it was my civic duty to poke the balloon. I owed it to the masses. it would be a sin not to. on top of all that, there was still the simple fact that the balloon would sing if I poked it. how could I not? I poked the balloon. bopping my head back to my register, I knew I would have to endure unspeakable hardship from my coworkers for the rest of the day. I smiled and hummed along. It was soo worth it.
You are still the one that makes me shout
Still the one that I dream about
We're still having fun, and you're still the one!
Peace out.
Sunday, January 20, 2008
Late Night Woes
So for a long time (I'm not sure exactly how long but for at least the past four months or so) I've been completely and totally lost as far as a future career is concerned. I don't know if any of you have ever played Four-Square before, but that's kinda how my life has been lately; bouncing from one square to another, one minute I want to be something with all my heart, the next minute I'm considering something else. it's incredibly frustrating...you have no idea.
I've been praying and reading my Bible like mad for a long time, but I just never hear anything back. one of the most frustrating things, I think, is that I say to God, "I'll do anything you want. anything at all. anything. just please tell me what to do." but He doesn't. I know I'm not supposed to, and I try not to, but sometimes I just can't help but wonder why He doesn't answer me. if I'm willing to do anything or go anywhere, I just want to know what to do, I don't get why He wouldn't tell me. and it's not just that I'm not getting an answer, it's also that I'm not getting any kind of response. that's the hardest thing of all. I pray and read and pray and read but I just always feel like a blind person wandering around all by myself.
I've been thinking a lot about this lately. now, say we have two choices. we can do A or B. if God wants us to do one but not the other, does that mean if we pick the wrong one we'll mess up God's divine plan?? OR does God already know ahead of time what we're going to do and simply plans accordingly? I'm inclined to believe the latter. but if that is true, then why should I even bother worrying about it? by that logic, I should just pick one and it'll be the right one because nobody can mess up God's plan. I'm sure that theory is full of holes, but for the life of me I can't find them.
Anyway...that's where my thoughts are these days. sorry this was such a strange post. it's kind of depressing, now that I think about it. ah, well, I blame it on the hour of night and my brain, which doesn't turn off at night like everybody else's. anyway, if you made it all the way through these ramblings...thanks. and if anybody out there has answers to these questions I wouldn't mind hearing them...
Wednesday, January 16, 2008
Beauty
Running through the busy day
Wrapped in a blanket of stress
Running here and doing that
Complaining that life is a mess
The sun comes up with an encore of color
Lighting up the sky
The flowers open and reach for the sun
For the sake of delight, the birds fly
From one problem to another
Life is getting old
You’re so busy fixing problems
You’re missing the beauty unfold
The blue sky graced by white puffy clouds
The small spider spinning its home
A busy little bee fills its legs with pollen
And heads back to the honeycomb
Unanimously shedding their leaves each year
The trees lapse into sleep
The clouds roll in, the thunder rolls
And the sky begins to weep
When evening replaces the daylight
The sky fades into twilight gray
Some animals are going to sleep
Some are coming out to play
Now it’s nighttime, the day is gone
And there’s something you should know
It’s been a whole day of incessant beauty
And you’ve missed the entire show.
Friday, December 28, 2007
Only 362 days until CHRISTMAS!!!!
I love being at my grandparents' house, but it's really really not relaxing at all. all ten of us cram into two, two bedroom houses for two weeks with other random family and friends popping in (uninvited, usually) at all hours of the day with all their kids and pets and whatnot...so there's really never a moment of silence or peace anywhere, unless you take the 4-wheeler out for a drive into the woods. the problem with that is if you stay out for more than 20 minutes, either Grandma calls Search and Rescue or you catch pneumonia from prolonged exposure to Minnesota's sub-zero temperatures. so I'm sure you can see why Nikki and I asked/pleaded/begged on our hands and knees to have Christmas at our house.
Anyway. we got our way. it's funny, cause usually if Nikki and I join forces and team up on our parents, we get what we want. the only thing I can think of that we never got was a cat. oh, and a horse. we wanted those and asked and asked and asked but never got 'em. but I'm not bitter. I'm not upset that my dad would never let me have a cat, even though it was my favorite animal ever and I even found a nice cute stray white one that had no home. I'm not angry that he chased it off the property, that he hated it just because it was missing an eye! can you believe that?! the cat is missing an eye and he can't have some compassion on it! you cruel, cruel man!! pfft. really. I'm not bitter. anyways. where was I? right, I remember now. and now Christmas is over and, once again, it doesn't feel like it happened at all. kinda like I slept for three days and just woke up and all I've got are a few sketchy memories of Christmas.
I've also been staying in Nikki's room, since mine has been inhabited by my grandparents who came to spend Christmas with us. I sleep on the floor, which didn't bother me for the first few nights. but as the week wore on it really started to bum me out. but thankfully, Nikki, probably because she doesn't have a job or school, habitually stays up into the early morning hours like I do, so I haven't had to adjust my sleep schedule at all! :D (hence, me writing this at 1 a.m.) It's been really fun, in fact, to be in Nikki's room. we don't really talk all that much beyond the occasional "Hey, do you know what Mom's making for supper tonight?" or "Can you move your car so I can get out of the driveway, please?" or "Hurry up in there!". but since moving my abode into hers, we've had quite a few good times and laughs. it gets a little tense, though, since I'm a naturally messy person and she's a natural neat-freak, but I've been trying to be better while I live in her room (really, Nikki, I am trying! I'm sorry about leaving my clothes on your bed, okay? I'm sorry. so sorry.)
So anyways, I'm bored with this so I'm gonna end it right here. Merry Late Christmas, everyone!
Wednesday, December 19, 2007
Perfect
So anyways. today I had no work and school is over (hallelujah) so I was so excited about doing nothing at all, or at least doing whatever I felt like. and so I decided on going to the mall to finish my Christmas shopping. I look outside and sure enough, my car is still trapped inside the garage. mom says not to worry, just take her car. no, I had had enough. I wanted Snoopy, and I wanted him now. I would not wait another day to free him from his prison. I even went through the pain and toil of moving Nikki's car, a half dozen 2x4s that were stacked behind my car, as well as the snow blower. I never knew snow blowers were so heavy! seriously...it was all I could do to move that thing. but finally, finally, after a week being in the tomb, Snoopy was free and we were tearing down 70th street, having a jolly good time.
So that evening when I came home, I was very tired (I'd been shopping all day...but be proud of me, I got all my shopping done!) and was anxious to get home. and it was like, all of a sudden, everything was perfect. the slight vibrations of the car were perfectly in sync with the rhythm of the music pumping through the speakers. and then (magically, I'm sure of it) this awesome song comes on the radio with just enough guitar and drums (and a piano), sung by some guy I don't know (but he had an awesome voice), and the song was about loving thunder and rain.
It was so neat...I was coasting at like, 50 mph on deserted streets at night listening to an awesome song in an awesome car. it was perfect. I didn't want it to end. I came to the place to turn to go home, and whoops...did I pass it? darn. gotta go the looooong way home. blast. I hate it when that happens. *turns up music*
